What Does It Mean to be Transgender

What it means to identify as transgender is going to be something different to every trans person but that doesn’t mean you can’t be respectful and understand meanings of words they may refer to themselves as or what it means to identify as trans in the broader sense of their everyday lives. 

This article explains the meaning of transgender and was written in conversation with members of the trans community who were happy to share their experience, and although what it means to be trans will differ from person to person, they were happy to share their perspective.

According to Stonewall, the UK’s leading LGBTQ+ charity, transgender is a broad term that can be used to describe people whose gender identity is different from the gender they were thought to be when they were born. Trans is often used as shorthand for transgender.

To treat a transgender person with respect, you treat them according to their gender identity, not their sex at birth. Gender identity is your internal knowledge of your gender – for example, your knowledge that you’re a man, a woman, or another gender. 

So, someone who lives as a woman today is called a transgender woman and should be referred to by their respective pronouns “she” and “her.” A transgender man lives as a man today and should be referred to as “he” and “him.”

Gender expression is how a person presents their gender on the outside. That might include behaviour, clothing, hairstyle, voice or body characteristics. Everyone has a gender identity, including cisgender – or non-transgender – people. If someone’s gender identity matches the gender they were assigned at birth, then they are cisgender, or “cis" for short. 

Always use the pronouns that the person uses to describe themselves. If you still aren’t sure, then it’s best just to ask. The awkwardness of asking is far preferable to the problems that could arise by using the wrong pronouns and if you don’t feel comfortable asking then use they / them pronouns as they are gender neutral.

Misgendering, a term used to describe the phenomenon of calling someone by a gendered pronoun they don’t identify with, is seen as an insult by many transgender people because it characterises them in a way they don’t relate to.

Some opponents of trans rights deliberately misgender trans people to express their disapproval. This acts as a constant reminder to trans people that large sections of the population still don’t understand or approve of their personal identity, which can be very upsetting.

Here’s the deal: many non-trans people are prejudiced towards trans people and write them off before getting to know them. A third of trans people (34 per cent)¹ have been discriminated against because of their gender identity when visiting a café, restaurant, bar or nightclub in the last year.

So, don’t be offended if a trans person doesn’t come out to you straight away. Just like you don’t tell someone everything about you (surprising talents, medical conditions, sporting accomplishments, family drama) the very first time you meet someone, trans people may want to roll out the news slowly as they get to know and trust you—especially in the context of the prejudice they often face by potential partners and society in general.

It is no longer a legal requirement to have surgery or hormones in order for the government and society to recognise people as the gender of their choice.

The medical term used to describe what transgender people go through is gender dysphoria. This is a medical condition for which people can access NHS treatment. 

Being transgender is by no means a modern phenomenon. Trans people are well documented throughout history and across the world and cultures. It is only recently, however, that Western cultures have developed the language to describe being transgender.

The 2021 Census was a historic moment for the LGBTQ+ community in England and Wales. For the first time, the Census included two new voluntary questions on sexual orientation and trans status.

0.5% of the population (262,000 people in England and Wales)² reported having a gender identity that is different from the one they were assigned at birth.

Within this, some may be surprised to learn that the number of trans women and trans men is almost exactly the same – each accounting for 0.1% of the population (48,000 people in England and Wales), with a slightly smaller proportion identifying as non-binary at 0.06% (30,000 people in England and Wales). 18,000 people wrote in a different gender identity.

Being trans comes with challenges and some of these challenges are exacerbated within dating. A lot of these challenges stem from transphobia. The ingrained hatred of people who identify as trans.

Trans people also face a lot of discrimination from both cisgender people and many others in the queer community. Oftentimes, there’s a lack of acceptance toward being with a trans person. Slurs and hateful judgement from other groups cause an uncomfortable or possibly dangerous experience. There’s also a high rate of sexual abuse, with more than a quarter of trans people (28 per cent)³ reporting being assaulted in the past year, and a lack of boundaries in sexual experiences.

It can also be a very different experience depending on whether a person transitioned before a relationship or during. Some trans individuals find it challenging to identify, even with the queer community, due to identifying as a different gender. It can be challenging to find those who completely accept you.

Badoo is an app dedicated to providing a safe and loving community for trans and gender-queer people to find accepting people. Connect one on one with people or be a part of groups or events to meet some special people. 

Rest assured you’ll meet like-minded people, new friends, and even your future love!