Dating apps are all about making connections, and can help us have great conversations with people we would never meet otherwise. 

But not every conversation is going to be life-changing. Most of us have probably experienced some sub-par dating app chat over the course of our romantic careers. 

We saw someone cute with a funny bio, maybe a picture with a dog, we swiped, we matched, we got excited, anticipating sparks, witty banter, maybe a June wedding, and then they opened with ‘hey’. 

The next match, who could have started a conversation with a joke, a story, a question, with absolutely anything in the world to make themselves stand out, went with ‘how are you doing?’ 

The one after that didn’t even send a message.

It’s a sad fact of the modern dating world: some matches just don’t make for great conversation, the kind of immediate connection that’s needed to catch your attention, get you excited, and keep things interesting. 

Or at least, that was the case. Now, things seem to be changing.

How The Coronavirus Is Changing Dating:

Since the outbreak of coronavirus (if you’d somehow managed to forget about it, sorry to bring it up), we’re actually seeing the amount and quality of messages go up now that people are spending time inside rather than going out on dates. 

Why is this? And what impact could this have on dating once we’re past the outbreak?

Why Dating App Conversations Are Getting Better During Isolation:

We Know We Can’t Meet For A While

Part of why messages are getting better is because people are actually taking the time to read each other’s profiles and write longer, more thoughtful messages. 

This in turn is leading to better conversations where we take the time to get to know each other.

In the past, we might have wanted to meet our matches quickly, to scope them out for real before someone loses interest. 

But now, there’s no longer any pressure to meet up as soon as possible, because we...can’t. 

Instead, we can just talk, knowing that we’re not going to have a date at a bar or restaurant any time soon. 

Singles are having video dates where they can have conversations in real-time, and find out if there’s chemistry between them. 

People are re-learning the art of conversation, as we are seeing better and longer conversations that will hopefully lead to better dates out in the world when things return to normal. 

People Genuinely Want To Talk

These deeper conversations show that people really want someone to talk to during isolation. 

This isn’t surprising, most of us are feeling lonely, and it can really help having someone to talk to, whether they’re listening to us pour our hearts out, or just providing a fun distraction. 

A weird side effect of this is that most of us are now using our phones as actual phones for the first time in a decade, calling our friends, family, and new crushes just to talk about...anything. 

Connection Means More Than Ever

We’ve all realised how important connections are. 

Part of why dating app conversations have gotten better is because we’re all suddenly playing bigger roles in each other's lives: we’re part of support networks, friendship groups, and communities.

Now, we’re understanding that people we’ve matched with aren’t just profiles, they’re real people for us to interact with, and grow closer to. 

With each conversation these relationships develop, becoming stronger. 

Having someone special who gets you excited when they’ve messaged is honestly one of the best feelings, and hopefully you’ll be able to lean on each other for support. 

This all points to the fact that we’re still interested in finding people, making connections, and dating, even if we can’t leave our homes. 

Of course, this all sounds great, but once we’re all out of lockdown will things just go back to the way they were before?

What Does This Mean For The Future Of Dating?

Hopefully, these new behaviours could mean a big shift in dating, even after we return to normal life.

More People Will Go On Video Dates

Since many of us are now going on video dates, it’s likely that more people will use video chat on dating apps after we return to normal.

It’s an easy way to vibe check people before you meet them, saving you wasted time and money if there’s no spark. 

More People Will Focus On Building Connections 

Since chats have gotten better, hopefully more people will realise the importance of making the effort to build a genuine connection through writing interesting, authentic messages. 

One strong first message is better than a hundred generic copy and paste ones, and people are starting to understand that taking the time to write something engaging can lead to something special.

People Might Not Feel The Pressure To Meet Right Away

Since we’re all accepting that meeting up isn’t an option, this might mean things can slow down once we can start dating out in the world again.

While we’re all probably going to want to run outside and meet as many people as we possibly can at first, knowing that we don’t have to meet within a few days of matching can give us some breathing room if we’re feeling overwhelmed. 

We should feel free to take things at our own pace, so figure out what that is for you. That might have changed by the time we’re on the other side of the outbreak, and that’s understandable.

The way we’re dating has changed, but the human need for connection isn’t changing any time soon.