First dates can be tough. You’re under pressure to be cool, funny, attractive, but perhaps most of all: interesting. 

So it’s not surprising that first dates can make us a little nervous. Nervousness kills good conversation, which is bad news for people looking to make a good impression.

A good first date requires a lot of talking. 

What you say, and how you say it, is one of the biggest factors in determining whether or not you will get a second date, so you’d better get working on your conversational skills. 

All of the points below rely on asking and answering questions about a topic that should be fairly important to each of you. These lead to a flowing conversation, an engaging connection, and a deeper investment in each other. 

Here are some things for you to talk about on your first date. 

Conversations To Have On A First Date:

Your Childhood And Where You’re From

If you want to have a deep conversation, ask about their childhood and their home town. 

All of us have stories from our childhood, memories of our home town that we hold onto, yet we only talk about them when someone pushes us to. 

If you both end up sharing anecdotes from your early life, you will probably end up much closer to each other by the end of the date, bonding over similar experiences. 

Travel

Travel is always a good topic to talk about, as everyone has a favourite place they’ve been, and a place they’d love to go. 

Talk about where you’ve been, and where you’d like to go next. This will get both of you talking, and might give you more insight into what they’re like as a person. 

If they want to go mountain-climbing and you like city breaks, that might be an issue. But if you both can’t wait to go to Venice, who knows, maybe the two of you will end up taking a trip in the future.

Food

There have been many different studies into how speaking about food can endear you to a potential partner. Food is deeply linked to our psychology, and if the two of you have the same favourite food you can share some for a second date!

Work

Work is always tricky to talk about with someone new. Some people love what they do for a living, some people absolutely hate it. 

Ask more than just ‘so what do you do?’ If they like what they do, ask what their favourite part of their job is, ask what inspires them, ask how they found their job.

If they hate it, ask what they’d rather be doing. If they do start to complain about their job, let them whine for a bit, complain about yours, bond about how awful jobs are, and then move on. 

Don’t get stuck listening to them for hours. 

If you hate your job, ask about theirs rather than complaining about yours. 

Shared Hobbies

If you’ve met on a dating app, you probably already know a little bit about each other before you go on your first date. 

If you know you have something in common, a shared hobby or pastime, you could have hours of conversation about that one topic. 

This is always good to fall back on, as long pauses in conversation are definitely something you want to avoid on a first date. 

First date conversations can be a minefield. But if you’re with the right person, the conversation should flow easily, with both of you feeling comfortable, engaged, and hopefully excited to see each other again. 

Find out more about how to have a good first date.

Find out how to date during winter.