It can be difficult to break the ice on dating apps. You probably don’t know much about the person you’ve matched with, you don’t know what they find funny or cute, and you don’t know how many other people are trying to catch their attention.
You can be sure of one thing though: you shouldn’t open with ‘hey’.
It’s boring, it doesn’t help you stand out, and you’ll probably get ignored.
Multiple studies have found that asking an open-ended question is the most effective way to get a response on dating apps.
You need to be interesting, and ask a question that will start a conversation.
Best Opening Lines For Dating Apps:
Top 3
If you’re struggling for something to open with, ask a question to get them talking. Everyone has a top 3 favourite movies, bands, food, or places they’d like to visit.
If they’ve mentioned any of these types of things in their profile, lead with that. It’s easy to get someone talking about something they love, so ask more about why that particular movie or food is their favourite.
If you want to be really different, try asking their least favourites. Everyone has a movie they wished they hadn’t wasted two hours of their lives watching, or a weirdly strong aversion to a certain food.
This can give you lots to talk (or argue) about, while also helping you get to know the person better.
If they love a genre of music you can’t stand, maybe it’s not worth continuing with. If they put pineapple on pizza, maybe just block them. It might be superficial, but these things might be really important to you.
On Your Last Day On Earth, What Would You Eat For Breakfast, Lunch, and Dinner?
While we’re talking about food, studies have shown that you’re more likely to get a positive response if you mention food in your message. This is probably because we’re psychologically wired to associate it with safety and happiness, a link that’s been around since our caveman days.
Asking someone this question will get them thinking about all their favourite foods, which will put them in a good mood, and will also give you a clue about who this kind of person is.
Would they have nothing but pizza and waffles? Would they have stay vegan if they knew they weren’t ever going to eat anything else ever again? People’s answers might surprise you.
Would You Rather X or Y
Another good way to break the ice is by asking them to make a choice between two things.
Dogs or cats?
Chinese or mexican?
Would you rather fight a duck-sized horse or a horse-sized duck?
These simple questions can highlight important differences between you - if you love dogs and they love cats, that might be an issue further down the line.
Of course, you can just ask silly questions if you want to have a laugh.
These questions can be about anything, but keep in mind that whatever you ask will also say something about who you are. You don’t want to ask anything too personal or invasive.
Two Truths And A Lie
If you want to get to know them quickly, two truths and a lie is good way to find out at least two facts about them straight away.
By the very nature of the game, these facts will probably be pretty exciting, and should hopefully lead to a longer conversation.
What’s The Worst Opening Line You’ve Ever Had?
This questions takes some of the pressure off you, by asking them about other conversations they’ve had on the app.
It will also remind them of all the boring, weird, or cheesy opening lines they’ve been sent, which will make you look much better by comparison.
Also, this will give you a good idea of things to avoid saying with other matches.
All of these ice breakers can be mirrored back at you, meaning you have twice as much of a chance at finding something in common.
By asking one of these questions, hopefully you’ll have more success getting responses on dating apps.
Read more about how to start a conversation on a dating app.
Read more of our tips for online dating.